Author: Angelicattie
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Storyline is mine. Not the characters.

Summary: Kyou's dreams cause an incident from the past to resurface and inspire him to find the cure for the Sohma curse. Will Kyou be able to go through with his plan with Akito's consent? Or will he be stopped short? Continuation (from the end of the anime)

Warning: beating, Used to be Akito rape, but now that Akito is a woman, although she still could . . . will have KYOUKE

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CHAPTER 2

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Kyou felt some relief from his solemn meditation on the roof, but conflict still bubbled inside him. The sun had been up for about two hours now, so Kyou headed into the house.

The other members of the household had noticed Kyou’s odd behavior. At first they thought that Kyou’s behavior had just been recovery from all that had happened during Kazuma’s visit, but that didn’t explain why Kyou had acted normally the day after or why it seemed that he was getting worse. They were often awoken by Kyou’s screams, signaling another nightmare, the nightmares were more frequent now, they had happened every night since Wednesday. A sort of tension hung around the house. Shigure, for once, thought it was best to keep his rather large mouth shut . Tohru was straining to keep from saying something, but she had promised not to make a big deal about their quiet moods, she simply continued to assure herself that Kyou would come when he was ready to talk. At first Yuki ignored it, being cursed as well he knew that it was important t o have time to yourself, but as time went on it looked like Kyou was taking more time to himself than was healthy and Yuki was starting to become concerned. He was beginning to wonder if he should approach Kyou himself if Kyou wasn’t going to talk on his own.

At breakfast they sat in silence, as they had become accustomed to. Shigure soon retreated to his study, things had become too dull around the house, so he immersed himself in his writing, but without the “wonderful vibes”, as Hanajima had called them, emanating from Kyou and Yuki, Shigure’s ‘muse’ had left him. Yuki left for his ‘secret base’, leaving Kyou and Tohru alone.

Tohru rose from the table, beginning to put the breakfast dishes away.

“ I think I’m ready to talk. I mean . . . if you don’t mind.”

“Of course I don’t mind Kyou! Whenever you need to talk I’m here. It’s important to let someone know how you feel. We’ve all been so worried about you; Shigure, Yuki, and I, not that Yuki said it aloud, but I can tell, he’s been more quiet than usual.”

“Yeah. Umm . . . I don’t think that rat would ever be losing sleep or anything like that over me.” Kyou said with a humorless chuckle. ”I still don’t think that I’m ready to tell yet , but if you guys really are worried about me I guess I should spill my guts and stop being selfish .”

“It’s not selfish to want to keep your troubles to yourself, but it’s healthier to tell someone, to share the burden, it may be difficult to carry, but it’s easier when you have some help, and did you ever consider that sharing your troubles can bring you closer to the ones you care about.”

“You’re right Tohru.”

“Wait in my room for me, I’ll be up there as soon as I clean up, then I can give you my full attention.”

Kyou headed upstairs and mumbled to himself, “Ever the perfect housekeeper.”

Tohru came to the room shortly after. Kyou was lying on the floor with his hands behind his head in a very catlike position, as was everything he did, but he was mildly tense, his restlessness could be seen in his eyes which continually darted around the room. Tohru sat at his side.

“Are you ready? Tell me what the nightmares are about.”

“They aren’t really nightmares, they’re sort of memories now . . . the first ones weren’t memories though, they were about you, . . . I didn’t know exactly what had happened, the day you visited Akito so in my dreams the worst had happened, and I wasn’t able to protect you. I know that Shigure, Hatori, and even that damned Yuki would protect you but they were all under Akito’s thumb, weak . . . , unlike me . . . , or so I thought.”

“Kyou, what do you mean?”

“I mean, he owns me too! Just as much as as he owns all the others! I thought I was free, not being a part of the zodiac, I thought that I wouldn’t be hurt by Akito until I was part of the zodiac and I thought by then that I would have the strength to handle it. I never realized that Akito already had complete control over me, and I was so weak that he only needed to see me once to set and maintain control. ‘You’re ugly’ ‘You stink’ ‘Your spineless mother’ ‘You’ll never be a member of the zodiac.’ I’ve been such an idiot.”

“Kyou, I don’t understand.”

“When you saw my transformation, that sort of thing doesn’t happen often. The only times I’m weak enough to transform into that other creature is when we have rainy weather, and I’m extra careful about the beads during those times, so the last time I transformed , that was also on purpose. When I transformed it triggered my memory, the time I had transformed before was when my mother took me to Akito.”

Kyou removed his shirt and turned so that his back faced Tohru. Tohru saw the scar, on Kyou’s back across the shoulder blade was clearly scarred into the skin AKITO.

“It’s not one of things you normally notice, you know, and I guess it had healed , but when I went through the transformation the skin broke.”

Tohru stared at the marks in disbelief.

“But Kyou, how did this happen? When did Akito do this? Why would he do this? I mean, even when Mom and Uo were in the gang, they never had to carry marks like this, not like a brand, not someone else’s name.”

“Yeah, well I guess this family is more fucked up than you thought.”

“Oh Kyou.” Tohru gasped.

“Akito did a lot of things to me, unspeakable things, that night when I transformed, I had only remembered what he had said to me, but after the dreams everything came back to me, all the pain, how he had tortured me, and how my mother had forsaken me. I’ve realized the truth now, despite how strong I try to be, I’m scared, scared of Akito, scared of the curse.”

“ It’s alright to be scared and frightened Kyou. Anyone whose gone through so much deserves a chance to voice their feelings freely.”

“I’m tired of being angry, I’ve found a way to forget the pain, ignore the past. Tohru, I have to find a cure, not just for my curse, but for the zodiac, to cure whole family. So no one will have to be pushed around, or have their lives ruined by Akito or the one who will come after him. So that brat Hiro can tell Kisa he loves her without one of them being beaten up. So that no one will end up like Hatori, carrying the memories of someone he loves who can’t remember him. So that no one will have to go through what we did, so they will never fear their mothers rejecting them.

So no one will ever choose to forget.

Tohru, I want you to come with me. You, Yuki, and Kagura, we’ll find the cure together. It’s time that the pain ended.

And I’ll have to talk to Akito, I’m afraid, but I’ll need to confront him, at least to tell him, to stand up for myself. Even if I’m not allowed near him, even if he doesn’t want to see me, even he he won’t consent to my plan. You’re so brave Tohru, not like me, not weak or afraid, but maybe I can try to be strong for myself now.”


Tohru smiled warmly at Kyou.
She gently took his hand and in the most innocent and childlike gesture she held it to her heart and kissed his cheek.

“Kyou I am so proud of you, You have found what you can do, what you want to do, to give your life meaning, to help those you care about. And of course I’ll help you, if we can wait for me to fulfill my promise to mom.”

“Really? You will?”

“Yes.”

“Then I’ll have it all planned! We’ll start when we graduate next spring.”

“But Kyou, what you said, about not choosing to forget, well, you shouldn’t forget either. I know that your memories of Akito hurt you, but you should work through the pain. You should talk with Yuki, you two don’t get along that well, and it may not be the most common way to start a friendship, but I think it will help both of you. Since you’re not comfortable telling me everything, maybe it will be easier with someone who has been through a similar experience, maybe you two can form a bond.”

Kyou’s eyes cast downward.
“I don’t know, it took a lot of courage, just to tell you this much. I don’t know if I could tell him, he infuriates me so much, and I’ve been so insensitive about his fear of Akito.”

“Well, now is your chance to apologize. Think about it, at least try, it can only do the both of you good.”

“I guess I can try, if you say so, I trust you Tohru. I hope you know how much you mean to me, to all of us.”

“Thank you.”

Wow. Sugoi. Soo much relief. I could cry. Scratch that. I could pummel something to death and then dance triumphantly, preferably Akito. So my target’s changed, I’m still as violent as ever.

Ah. Half the battle is over!

Now, concerning my former nemesis . . . umm . . . what did Tohru ask me to do again? O.K. even I’m not that stupid. I still don’t know, I think Tohru is right, but it’s Yuki, the one I hated, . . . (the one who held me when i needed it most). Well if for no other reason than to appease Tohru I’ll talk to him.

But first, lunch.

Kyou was on the roof again, emotionally preparing to talk to Yuki, when he smelled Tohru’s cooking.

Salmon and Cod, sometimes I could marry that girl.

Kyou came into the house.

Tohru, overjoyed at Kyou’s admission of his secret, was preparing a feast of Kyou’s favorite foods. Shigure and Yuki came into the dining room, delighted to see Tohru’s smiling face, which had been so scarce lately.

“Our little flower is smiling again, the snow has melted, the clouds have cleared, peace is restored once more, clearing the dank air of the musty atmosphere. . .”

“Stop your damn poetic talk.”

“So what happened, Tohru, to save my house from depression and despair, why is there now an air of happiness?”

“I think it’s best that Kyou tell you his plan.”

And sometimes I could wring her neck

“It’s none of your business, but I’m going to find a cure for the Sohma curse.”

Shigure began chuckling to himself (it lasted about five minutes).

“In all seriousness Kyou, it’s a nice goal, but I think that’s impossible.”

“Nonsense, Kyou can do it, like my motto says ‘never give up’”

“I think it’s a good idea.” Yuki said nonchalantly.

“Really? I’m glad you think so, because Kyou wants to ask for your help.”

Must. Resist. Urge. To. Wring. Neck.

A vein throbbed on Kyou’s head as he ground his teeth.

Yuki’s jaw dropped.

“I didn’t want to admit it, but Tohru’s right. Anyone who can beat me every time we fight is worth having on my journey, would you . . . come . . . along?’

Yuki’s mouth still hung open.

“Close your mouth kuso nezumi, you’re catching flies.”

Yuki closed his mouth.

“So will you or won’t you. I can’t waste my whole day sitting here waiting for you”

“ . . .

umm . . . Yes?”

It was Kyou’s turn to be shocked. The two exchanged blank expressions.

“really? . . . umm . . . O.K. . . . thank you?”

Was I just dreaming or did Yuki say yes? Did I hear that right? Did he really just agree to help me? I guess he doesn’t hate me as much as I thought. Maybe it won’t be so hard to talk to him after all, just maybe.


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A/N; Sorry that this chapter is so shonen-ai-less, stick with me, it’s about to get good. Till next time, minna-san.